Since Xiamen has become one of most developed cities on China’s southeast coast, women here face more opportunities and challenges in their lives. Unlike their mothers, whose working - and, often, private lives were determined by the state, women today can largely choose their own paths.
Yet along with freedom come self-expectation, confusion and soul searching in who they are and who they should be. Should they be a ‘strong woman’ and make money and have a career, maybe grow rich, but risk not finding a husband or having a child? Or should they marry and be a stay-at-home housewife, support the husband and educate the child? Or, should they be a ‘flower vase’ - the kind of woman who marries a rich man, drives around in a BMW or Mercedes but has to put up with his concubines? This article will show you some aspects of the lifestyle of Xiamen women and the situation they face now.
Career women in Xiamen
With jobs in offices, their own cars, maybe even a flat and a mortgage, life for hundred of thousands of Chinese women in Xiamen has changed dramatically from three generations ago, when foot-binding from the age of four was common, followed by marriage at 15 and then decades of successive pregnancies.
Just graduated from a university four years ago, pretty Miss Ye has become the sales director of an advertising agency in Xiamen. The 26-year-old has bought herself a big apartment near Wuyuan Bay and she revealed that her income was at least 20 times more than common white collars in Xiamen.
Dressed in a pink D&G dress, Miss Ye looks like a sweet young girl more than a business woman. “I prefer fashionable casual dress rather than formal business suits. My job is related to beauty and fashion and I want to show my personality through my clothes.” Miss Ye said, “I love famous brands. I meet models, stars and bosses everyday, and these name brands could make me feel more confident.” The young lady revealed that she always bought Versace makeup from Hong Kong and she’s also a big fan of Dior perfume.
Miss Ye’s mum, a 50-year-old pediatrician thought her daughter burn a hole in her pocket and always urged her to save money, but Miss Ye said it was unnecessary. “I see buying famous brands as an investment in my job. If I do better then I can earn more in the future. Money is just a figure doesn't mean anything if we don’t spend it.” Miss Ye said, “The society is totally different from when my mum was young. Chinese people were mostly poor 20 years ago.”
Miss Ye has a long-term boyfriend and the couple plans to get marry next year. “My boyfriend just started his own business in Jinjiang. His income is less than mine now, but I don’t mind. I met him when I was a student. We know each other and love each other.”
Miss Ye is not alone in her quest for happiness, seeking love more so than money. Despite the media hype, it is a fallacy that women are only attracted to men with power and success. A recent survey conducted by the All-China Women's Federation revealed that the new generation of successful young women rates a sense of responsibility and personal integrity as the most important traits in a partner. Two-thirds, in fact, said they wouldn’t mind if their husbands brought home less money than they did.
Xiamen housewives
Urban wives have to do the majority domestic choirs while they are engaged in full employment outside the home. These few years, a new trend is developing in Xiamen as women choose to return to their families instead of continuing the fight in the career world.
30-year-old Wang Hexiu left her job when she got pregnant and became a fulltime mother after giving birth. To relieve her husband's pressure of supporting the whole family, Wang started her online business on Taobao last March. Just one year later, Wang has become a successful online seller and she can earn at least 10,000 yuan a month. “I really enjoy my life now. I can prepare breakfast for my husband every morning and spend more time with my son.” said Wang.
Housewives may take the initiative to create their own ideal lifestyles— cultivating hobbies like painting, cooking, knitting or design. Some even start small businesses at home like selling things online. Besides, they possess keen social communication skills. They still keep close ties with society through the Internet and other modern high-tech tools. They have their own friends and they take part in social clubs, keeping them closely linked with the latest trends.
However, "returning to the family" does not mean housewives have found a haven. They also face challenges as in any other career. The first is economic risk. It is not easy to support a family on only one income. If the husband's career meets a setback, the whole family's life will be affected. The second risk is lack of self-fulfillment. There is nothing more tedious and boring than housework. Their achievements from their former career have made it difficult to accept a boring home life. The third risk lies in the marriage. Since housewives treat being a housewife as their career, their husbands are figuratively their bosses. It is possible the boss may fire his wife if he is not satisfied with her.
Marital experts agree that a happy life is defined by oneself and wise women will never let themselves get submerged by marriage but instead try to discover their own value in marriage, and they choose the best lifestyle suited to various stages of their life.
Women are no doubt one of the most beautiful things in Xiamen. Walking the streets of the city, you can see many kinds of local women. Whether they are young or old, rich or poor, you can always find confident smiles on their faces. Social status and income may affect the living standard of a woman, but can’t determine the quality of her life.
